One more refuse!

As much as I hate to admit it, another rejection didn’t really affect me. Not a big deal, simply another publishing house that didn’t want to publish my work. Another competition I didn’t win. But there’s still something nice about knowing that someone, somewhere, is reading what I wrote, even if there’s no feedback. It’s understandable—they can’t respond to everyone, or they’d never get anything else done.

But we don’t give up and we don’t get sad. We just keep writing.

~~~

Ще одна відмова!

Як не прикро це визнавати, але чергова відмова майже нічого не зворушила всередині мене. Невелика справа, ще одне видавництво не захотіло мене публікувати. Ще один конкурс не виграно. Втім, це відчуття, що хтось десь читає те, що ти написав – доволі приємне, хоча немає жодного зворотнього зв’язку. Це зрозуміло, якщо відповідати кожному, можна забути про життя взагалі.
Та ми не здаємося і не сумуємо. І продовжуємо писати.

G-growing

Just trying to grow my own confidence by inspiring with nice memos like this. It doesn’t work well so far, but I am not to give up.

P.S. Did you notice summer has crept upon us?

~~~

Намагаюся відростити собі трохи впевненості за допомогою таких милих записочок. Поки що все кепсько, але я не здаюся.

П.С. Ви помітили що до нас підкралося літо?

Blackout

Today I overslept, but the new day came as always. It didn’t wait for me to catch up.

But it is okay. I needed this day to put myself together. Let’s hope it worked.

Earlier today I bumped into video of Ke Huy Quan overcoming with emotions when he was accepting his Oscar. I was so glad for him, like for no one else on the Earth. I would be acting the very same if I were on his place. I won’t be there but it was nice to share that joy.

I love people that are real. With real emotions.

Sister told me today that she is proud of me no matter what. I cannot imagine what I would do without her. She is the most supportive person I have ever had in my life.

Let’s see what comes tomorrow.

It can become worse

Always.

When you think you are in the bottom – suddenly you find out you are still falling, drowning in the darkness of a sea called desperation.

I got a message today I wish I had never received. Feeling frustrated, disappointed,anxious about. Only yeasterday I though that I might have obtained kind of stability.

How fool was I.

It always can become worse.

New Year, you must be kidding me.

That is a piece of…

… a cake of course. That is what anybody would say if you asked them how to find a new life in a new world.

Boolshit.

What are my options? To find a some stupid work just to get by, or a super smart one and ran off from it next week? Should I seek longer or agry the first offer? Should I try findiing something I might really like or should I dirft?

I don’t like any of the options.

I am out of source as it is commonly named.

This stupid war exhausted me, and I am even not near of it now. I only heard a couple of explosions 24th of Feb, early in the morning. And I fled the country.

I just need a bit of luck, to survive until this stupidity is over and I will be with my husband again.

Hopefully.

God. I am so lost. Please give me a hand.

Not all who wander are lost

J.R.R.Tolkien

I wish I weren’t that lost.

Sooner or later

Elliston Park, Calgary

Life is like a wheel. Sooner or later, it always come around to where you started again.

Stephen King

Being thousands of miles away from home, I came up with understanding I need to start all over again.

You may consider it as bless or curse, it depends on your situation. However, for now I know the one thing – it is freaking me out.

All is new and different. Even toiler paper.

It is a big deal.

Things, I got used to, literaly save my brains. So I keep holding to them.

Trying to start acting like and adult and responsible person. It does not work each time. But doooooon’t stop belieeeeeviiiiing.

The Year

“That which does not kill us makes us stronger.” – Friedrich Nietzsche

It has been a tough year for almost everyone in my near acquaintance. There were bad days and ‘I-can-handle-it’ days. There were few good ones.


I lost my dad due to COVID-19.
I fled from Ukraine due to hostilities russia launched.
I haven’t seen my husband for 8 months by now.

I am alive, I am safe. I have my mom and sister around.

Mykolaiv, Ukraine, created by Midjourney AI

I just want to hope it makes any sense and will make me stronger. Cause I don’t feel like I am strong enough.

Moi aussi

Ничто не гаснет, не увядает бесследно.

Всегда есть путь, есть нить, что связывает твою жизнь. То что было с тем что стало.

Всегда есть выбор как поступить.

И у меня так же.

Но что же выбрать?